I am what most would call an “introvert.” 

A little quiet when around large groups of people. 

Doesn’t mind spending time alone. 

Is often found staring off into the distance and can’t quite seem to start a conversation. 

That’s me and most likely some of you too. 

Being a so called “introvert” can be very difficult at times, especially when it comes to making friends. It’s often hard to be the one to start a conversation with someone you have never talked to before or even if you have it can sometimes be just as hard. 

The reason why this is so difficult, for me anyway, is that I like to speak in just the right way. I think it’s more the perfectionist in me that wants to state things as clearly and articulately as possible. But, in order to respond the way I really want to I need time to think. The thing is, people would probably think I was pretty odd if every time someone said something to me I left about 30 seconds of dead air before finally giving a response. That is why instead my sentences tend to come out short and choppy. My response variables are still being calculated after the socially acceptable amount of dead air time. 

This is primarily the reasoning for my “introvertism.” I tend to get stuck inside my own thoughts. If you see me with a blank expression on my face and staring, then that’s what I’m most likely doing. Sometimes, though, I actually am dozing off and could very possibly be asleep, but that’s not usually the case. 

People often get the misconception that I am really shy because I’m introverted or that I am not very confident in myself. This is not true, sure a person can be both introverted and shy, but not always. Shyness is usually defined as being timid or nervous when talking to people. In my case, I don’t feel this way at all, in fact I usually feel pretty comfortable when talking to people, but because of my perfectionistic tendencies the way I communicate comes of sounding shyer than the way I feel.  

There are many different reasons why people act introverted, though, this is only my truth. A girl who has spent her whole life thinking about what she’s going to say next. A girl who writes to prove that she actually has words to say even if they aren’t out loud or in the moment. A girl who deserves to be heard and understood, just like everyone else. 

So, if you see someone who is like me, feel free to talk to them and don’t give up right away if they don’t give you the response you’re looking for. It takes a while to warm up to people and feel safe to share the complexity of our mind. You never know, becoming friends with an “introvert” might just be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make.